Gimpy Mumpy

TENS Jacket?

With the return of sunshine and fair weather Miss Mumpy is getting ready to shed some layers of clothing.  This often presents problems though like where do I put my TENS unit? 
With so many new lines of iPod clothing, such as this iPod Jacket from Vickerey, this summer looks promising for Gimp Gear.  Hooray!

Via Techie Diva

Wow! You're completely unstable!

My physical therapist had an epiphany yesterday and we actually made progress.
While going through the torture of trying to walk in the pool he continued to ask me questions while tears ran down my face and I fought down the urge to vomit.  Suddenly he runs off and comes back with a SI-Loc Brace.  We go through the painful process of getting me out of the pool and he puts the belt-like brace on me.  Voila!
"Oh my god," he says "You're standing up straight".  Straight? My first thought is oh my god I'm not in pain.  I'm not even remotely nauseas.  He asks me to try going down the stairs into the pool.  I walk down them easily and relatively pain free.  No more tears.  No more nausea.  "You want to try walking around the pool?" he asks.  Walk around the pool?  No problem.  I feel like I can do anything. 
The next 45 minutes were spent trying things I am never able to do and doing them.  O.k., I'll admit in the exitement of the moment we did overdo things a bit but I was able to do it! 
Apparently my SI-joints (sacroiliac) are unstable. They've become dislocated, probably way back when I fell 3 years ago, adding substantially to my pain and lack of recovery.
I was given my own belt brace to wear home and told I could wear it whenever I am out of bed.  "Just try taking this thing off me!"  So today marks the 24 hour point and I still feel great.  It hurts when I have to take the brace off but otherwise I just have a bit of bruisy aches similar to when an orthodontist tightens your braces.
I can't stop smiling.  :)

Beware the Ides of March

Oh I really should have paid greater attention to bad omens and remained far, far away from anything vaguely medical this month! 
What began as a worsening of pain & other problems earlier in the month has snowballed into at least four days a week of lengthy medical visits and additional trips to the hospital for painful testing.  Add into the mix the expected miscommunications between health providers, the inconvenient inaccessability of staff who know me due to spring vacations and the seemingly evil barriers placed by my insurance company I cannot help but wonder if I should have gone into hiding for the month of March.

Doh Boy combats stealth fat

The Doh Boy toy and baking tin out to make a difference:

"His name is Doh Boy and his mission is to take the fat back out of bread. Doh Boy reckons ‘we don’t kneed it’. The only reason it is there is to help make bread quicker to make and make it last longer on the shelf. Doh Boy thinks this technique (called Chorleywood) has made fatter profits for those who make and sell it. But it has also made us all a little fatter as a result. Stealth fat is a growing problem. These are the fats that we don’t know are there. We expect there to be fat in a chocolate bar. But we don’t expect 3 slices of some breads to have as much fat as that chocolate bar."

Hey Doh Boy, you had me at stealth fat. 

via Cool Hunting

MRI on the down low

Yesterday we got up at an ungodly hour (don't they ever schedule these tests at hours when most people are awake?) and traveled to the hospital for my second post-op MRI (technically MRI scan #4, but who's counting?).
Since the experience had been so much fun last week I was really looking forward to getting this scan over with.  Unfortunately it was over a bit faster than planned.  I should have known by the strange looks I was getting on the way in, but hey it's not like it's the first time and when I was there for my scan last week the pain was so bad that I had to be assisted out while balling my eyes out.  But yes my gimpy sense should have kicked in at this point. 
I was only in the machine about a minute when they shut it down and came on the intercom to announce that they couldn't scan my lower spine at all because of the interference from all of my metal implants.  Hello!  Not only had I discussed in detail my implants with every one of their staff prior to the scan but I had also discussed it with my doctor.  The tech then came out and rudely made it clear that I had wasted their time.  Their time?!  They probably made a couple grand the second I got into their damn machine!  How about my time? 
She proceeded to ask if I had ever had x-rays of my lower back.  Nah, I just thought I'd go through extensive surgery of by lower back and never have x-rays.  What?  Of course I've had x-rays.  I've had more x-rays of my spine than I have teeth in my head.  At this point she became completely unreasonable and shut the door to the MRI booth in my face.  Grrrr.....

Addicted to Nasal Spray?

You are not alone.  "(But) relief provided by nasal spray decongestants like Afrin and Neo-Synephrine comes at a price: the risk of rebound congestion caused by overuse and, for some people, a vicious cycle of overuse and dependence that feels like an addiction."
Here, here!  This is a topic grossly under represented in the press.  My father had this addiction when I was younger.  It began with seasonal allergies and ended years later with an operation to enlarge his sinus passages.  If you were to hear him describe the sensation of having the gauze removed after the surgery, you would never ever abuse nasal sprays. 

You have got to be kidding me...

After a long day at the doctor's they have concluded that I need another MRI scan, this time of the lower spine.  Hmmm.....didn't I suggest this last week?  Wouldn't it have been easier to do one big scan rather than two?  Grrrr......
My next MRI scan is scheduled for this upcoming Saturday morning.  Let's hope it goes better than the last scan.
The docs also decided I needed to try another medication so Mr. M drove me WAY out of our way to my pharmacy to fill the prescription.  The pharmacist couldn't fill it though because my insurance requires a pre-authorization for any "off label uses" and since my condition doesn't fit neatly into a nice black & white box EVERYTHING is an off label use.  *sigh*  So we wait.

Magnetic Mumpy

Miss Mumpy had her MRI scan on Saturday and let's just say things didn't go well.
For starters she pulled (slipped/tore/herniated/who knows?) something in and around her upper lumbar/lower thoracic spine while in pool therapy on Thursday.  Friday morning the pain was even worse and there was an overwhelming sense of wrongness.  I find this difficult to describe but those who have chronic conditions know their pain.  You know all the weird and wacky sensations your body produces and this was not in Mumpy's pain repertoire.  After taking a hot shower, popping an extra muscle relaxer and getting back into bed she called her doctor who's nurse instructed her to take hot showers, increase her dose of muscle relaxer and stay in bed.  Wow!  I never would have thought of that.  The only activity aloud over the weekend was the trip to the hospital for the MRI scan (which Mumpy asked if the additional area where the new pain was could be added to the scan, but the doctor said no).
Hospital scheduling had screwed up the arrival time so Mumpy was there an hour early.  When finally brought into the next level of radiology waiting rooms she was told that it now was supposed to be her time to be scanned but that the woman ahead of her kept pushing the panic button and that she'd probably have to wait an additional 30 minutes for them to get through this woman's scan.  "Hmmmm, I have a suggesting how about making the woman reschedule and letting me in?"  "No?, well then you better find a place for me to lay down before I pass out from pain."  So, Miss Mumpy ended up on a rickety stretcher whose wheels did not lock in a drafty hallway while continually hearing the machine in the adjacent room turn off.  Additional staff kept rushing into the room supposedly to help the panicky woman.  The wait continued.  Finally it was Mumpy's turn.  The machine was rock hard and the constant pressure against the lower back while vibrating for half an hour was excruciating.  No walking sticks aloud in the MRI room of course so the crying, shaking mess that exited was a sight to behold.  Fortunately this was all on a Saturday so none of Miss Mumpy's pool therapy peers were there to see.

Drunken Doctor Quote of the Week

"Do you know that I am a (expletive) doctor, and I'm going to do what I want," said Federico Castro-Moure, chief of neurosurgery at Highland Hospital, according to a witness.

Pharmacy Notes Customer as "Psycho" & "CrAzY!"

Ever wonder what your pharmacist thinks about you?  Well a Palm Beach woman recently found out. 
Employees at her local Walgreens pharmacy had been using the comments section of the nationwide database to leave demeaning comments about pharmacy customers.  Last week when Miss Karp received her medications the comment page was attached.  Pharmacy staff had typed in comments such as, "CrAzY!" and "She's really a psycho!!! Do not say her name too loud, never mention her meds by names".  Miss Karp explained that in the past pharmacy staff would yell out her name and what meds were ready.  Since she was taking medications for depression and anxiety she had asked that they not yell out such things.  Hmmmm, her wishes were not "psycho" or "CrAzY!" those are basic rights of confidentiality!