Gimpy Mumpy

It's all fun & games until someone performs a crappy surgery

There have been some great celebratory suggestions for my 2-year post-op failed back surgery anniversary today. 
I would just like to add one more to the mix; Pin the Tail on the Doctor using these pushpins.  Ouch! 
So far my celebration activities have included a walk on the beach (where I had a wonderful spontaneous discussion with a fellow disabled), stopped for icecream, and received a lovely gift of sticky electrodes for my TENS Unit from my physical therapist. 

2 Year Post-Op Anniversary

Tomorrow is the 2-year anniversary of Mumpy's failed back surgery!  Any gift ideas for her surgeon?  First thing that comes to mind is an anonymous flaming bag of poo....
Anniversary celebration suggestions also welcome.

33 Pound Abdominal Cyst Missed By Negligent Doc

This doc gets the Negligent Doctor of the Week Award. 
When his 44-year old female patient came to him with concerns over 16 months ago this doc told her she was "overweight".  I suppose that is one way to describe a 33 pound (14.7 kg) abdominal cyst but the diet pills he prescribed her caused her to become clinically malnurished.  The patient discovered her condition when rushed to hospital with severe abdominal pain.

Private Public

Want to be bothered less by strangers while waiting for your doc to call your name?  Want more privacy while killing time watching porn writing a text message in the patient waiting area?  Then Private Public may be just the bit of gear for you.
I just can't wait to see this implemented as another part of HIPAA.  Protect patient confidentiality AND be able to make rude funny gestures at your doc while he's doing so.  Brilliant!

Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice....

.....that's what little gimps are made of? nah!  That is what dinner is made of. 

"He who controls the Spice controls the universe"--Baron Harkonnen 

I have just received my first order of wonderfully fresh spices from World Merchants a Seattle based purveyor of spices, herbs and teas.  Oh and their selection of dried chilis is phenomenal! With the new Amazon Grocery service and my luck in finding World Merchants I have stumbled into gimpy culinary and shopping bliss.  Mmmmm....

All Packed Up With Nowhere To Go

You can always tell my really bad days weeks by the the packed bags by the door with my binders of medical records sitting beside it. 
This week was one of those weeks.  The bags are a "just in case" measure but I've come to the conclusion that no matter how much pain I am in there is nothing a trip to the hospital can do to help.  When I'm in this much pain I want to hold up a big sign in the ER saying "Check Me In!" but even if I were admitted inpatient there is nothing more to be done.  This is where the depression goblins attempt to nibble at the edges of those of us with chronic pain. 
I've bounced back of course.  A few "buttiquette" inspired jokes to my PT yesterday and I am feeling more myself again.  If you ever stop by and see a stack of medical records beside my luggage though you may wish to turn back and run!

Change of Shift: Volume One, Number One

The Nursing Blog Carnival's Change of Shift: Volume One Number One is here!  Brainchild of the amazing blogging nurse Kim, of Emergiblog and Scared to Health, Change of Shift shares nursing stories from "doctors, patients, students and paramedics".

Mumpy particularly enjoyed the Your Boyfriend Is Hot submission from Messadventures Galore.

O RLY?

I've just got off the phone with my doctor's office only to realize that I just spent ten minutes thanking them for a referral to a proctologist. Damn. 
So how do I prepare for my appointment?  What's the proper proctologist office etiquette? 
I know!  I'll print out the O RLY? owl and put the picture on a stick so every time my doc informs me of something I can hold it up to face him.  Perfect. 

School for Disabled Youths Use Restraints and "Skin Shocks"

A Shocking Story.

Amazon Grocery

Amazon Grocery is the new gimpy alternative to traveling to the grocery store.  Although they do not as yet offer perishable goods, they do have tons of products that I love. 

My fave groceries delivered right to my door?  Ahhh...gimpy heaven!