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July 15, 2006


Phsysical Therapy Horseheads

I've had multiple similar experiences. It's disheartening and unfair, but unfortunately it's something that has to be dealt with.

Colin M. Sullivan

Sometimes we're all just jackasses. I can't think of any other way to say it. Didn't you ever let a real "idiot's delight" fly from your mouth. Happens to me all the time:
"How's Mary?"
"She's dead. Didn't you get my notes?"
"Ahm...I mean did she suffer much?." (Please God, get me out of here)
"Yeah, she suffered brutally. I sent you all those notes. (unopened in my desk). Tell you what , Colin. Lose my address, number and forget get you ever knew me."
"But we're brothers!"
Yes, this can be me, King of the Shit-heads. This story never happened but it could. I might just as easily be on the recieving end....
I know this, I'm at my best when I can look at those morons, and say, "There but for the grace of God...". After-all, we're just people.
I am sorry you had to endure it. Besides we'll all be dead in 50-70 years anyhow and none of this will mean a damned thing, except that maybe we forgave someone. Sorry to sound so sanctimonious. Your friend, Colin

wild child

Sorry to hear about Toby.

Re the guy who kept asking if you can still run, some people can be just plain stupid.

all the best

w1ld child


Sounds like you need to see this guy - if only he wasn't just a character in a story, this world would be a little nicer.


A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the 4 pups. And set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard.

As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked down into the eyes of a little boy.

“Mister,” he said, “I want to buy one of your puppies.”

“Well,” said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat of the back off his neck, “These puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money.”

The boy dropped his head for a moment. Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer. “I’ve got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?”

“Sure,” said the farmer. And with that he let out a whistle. “Here, Dolly!” he called.

Out from the doghouse and down the ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur.

The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight. As the dogs made their way to the fence, the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse.

Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller. Down the ramp it slid. Then in a somewhat awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up....

“I want that one,” the little boy said, pointing to the runt.

The farmer knelt down at the boy’s side and said, ”Son, you don’t want that puppy.

He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would.

With that the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers. In doing so he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a specially made shoe. Looking back up at the farmer, he said, “You see sir, I don’t run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands.”

With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup.
Holding it carefully he handed it to the little boy. “How much?” asked the little boy.

“No charge,” answered the farmer, “There’s no charge for love.”

(I can't imagine why I thought of you when I read this. Nope...........not at all)


That guy was a dope. If you want to be charitable, consider him "socially inept" and spare half a second to feel sad for him.

I've been a volunteer at an animal shelter, and I've adopted a cat through the same shelter. Sure, most animal shelter people want to be sure that the people adopting animals will be good to them. But that doesn't mean that the staff, and volunteers as well, can't sometimes be dopes. And this guy, whatever his intentions, was a DOPE.

The Goldfish

This sounds like a very emotional experience to go through so soon after Toby's death. I guess having been round and having realised that these questions will be asked, you can be more prepared next time.

If you think about what these folks actually want to know (clearly none of them need to know about your medical history - only its potential impact on dog ownership) - then perhaps you can think about the very specific answer to give. That way it hopefully won't be such an ordeal.

Good luck, Mumpy, sorry that you must be having such a hard time just now.


I'll add another comment: many of the rescue animals have been victims of some dickhead's indulging itself in an impulse buy, or have been given as surprise presents to someone who wasn't expecting a pet and turned out not to want one anyway.

If the reception people get causes them to think twice about adopting, that's all to the good. It means that only those who are fully committed will persist.


Mumpy, for many years I have been involved with animal charities and rescue. I can't obviously say what was the reasoning behind the comments/questions you received, but her is a bit of explaining how such organisations work.

People who work in animal rescue get used to dealing with would be adopters who, at some level, feel they are doing *you* and the animal a favour, and therefore should be greeted with open arms. It doesn't work like that. Most of the animals that end up in sanctuaries have seen the darker side of humanity - they've been neglected, abused, abandoned. The staff are there to make sure they don't go through that again. They *have* to suss out whether you are fully prepared to take on *all* that an animal needs, including the less entertaining or tasteful aspects, and they can't tell that just by looking at you.

You would be horrified to realise how many people think of pet animals as animated cuddly toys, and begrudge tending to their emotional and even physical needs. Some don't even seem to realise that animals have needs - the ones who are amazed to find that a dog needs exercise off the leash, or a cat must be neutered, or a bird needs company. Let alone those who begrudge spending any money on a "free" pet.

The chap who kept on about your ability to run, for example - was he maybe thinking about your ability to keep up with a dog exercise-wise; control him; get him out of trouble if need be?

Please don't be offended - I am sure you will make a wonderful adopter, but try to be patient with the hoops to jump through. They are there for very sad reasons.

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